If you're someone who wants to realize their potential but feels their pot use is getting in the way, buy the ebook "Marijuana Mindfulness" by Gabriel Santos: https://amzn.to/2rMOjRU
For over 7 years I struggled with marijuana use. By struggle, I mean I used it in such a way that (1) I was not performing at a high level in life and (2) I was emotionally and spiritually dependent on marijuana to get me through my life. I recognized early on that I liked weed a little too much, but it wasn't until year 7 that I finally went from being an irresponsible "addict" type pot user to one who only uses it once a month without letting it get in the way of things.
The short answer to why I still smoke weed once a month is this: I like smoking weed and the feeling of being stoned. If you like weed you can understand why. If you don't smoke weed, or don't like it, to each their own. Just think of something you like that others don't, and you'll get what I'm saying.
Because marijuana is still a taboo subject, and polarizing, there's still a level of judgment or lack of normalcy attached to those who smoke weed. That's my story at least. I digress.
In a traditional sense, it's not a good or practical idea for someone with an addictive, abusive history to ever again use the substance that triggers them. For some its cigarettes. Others its video games. For me it was marijuana.
Addiction is a pretty complicated mess, one that's particularly hard to untangle, but there are some personal breakthroughs that have allowed me to (1) no longer be addicted to weed and (2) still enjoy it the same way a person who's never been addicted can enjoy it.
Here's the truth: Addiction is a victim story.
To be addicted is to say you don't have control of your actions. To be fair, some habits, especially chemically bonded ones, can be so strong that personal will can be outmatched.
However, to blame chemicals or habits instead of taking responsibility is not justifiable for things like not showing up to work. You don't show up to work it's cause you didn't show up for work.
If you smoked a cigarette it's caused you smoked a cigarette. If you smoked a joint it's cause you smoked a joint. If you smoked weed every day for 7 years and got a C average in college and gained 25 pounds of fat, it's cause you did all that.
I have total empathy and compassion for how difficult it is to create results in life. Even more so if there's a habit such as smoking that is at the crux of holding you back.
My point is this, I realized that (1) I love weed and (2) I was the one using it a way that fucked my life up. It was NEVER weeds fault my life turned out the way it did. It won't be weeds fault if I become a massive success.
It was and is always me at the crux of my life and how things go.
And so, in my past, for 7 years, I was the one who chose to smoke every day, spend tons of money, and play PS3 instead of study.
Now, I am the one who chooses to smoke once a month, save money, and read books instead.
I smoke weed because I like it and I know I have full control over it. And I'm aware of what happens if I use it too much.
I don't make myself wrong for doing it.
The take away point is this: Just because you're fat doesn't mean you have to cut pizza out of your life. It's not wrong to eat pizza. What you do have to get is that (1) being fat is a choice, and if you don't like it you must be responsible for being what you do want and (2) there is a way to enjoy your love of pizza and still be the version of yourself that's in shape and healthy.
Quitting pizza is one version of that. Eating it once a week is another version. And there are tons of other versions.
As it relates to myself and weed, quitting never worked for me. And so I tried something different. Now, I do it once a month and usually only if I've grown significantly in terms of my goals.
In an even simpler way: smoking weed once a month is what works for me in terms of overall success and fulfillment in life.
THE END.
Much love,
GS
